"Uh...no", I said as I walked away. "I'm just not willing to go there." And God stood quietly and watched until I disappeared out of sight.
There was no turning back as I wandered aimlessly down the road hoping He would forget what just happened. I was angry and embarrassed, and quite frankly I didn't want to have to face the cold hard truth. All of the emotion I was experiencing brought out the stubborn little girl I'd worked so hard to suppress all the days of my youth. She was showing up a little more frequently as of late; I began to be more and more accommodating to her each time she surfaced, while she fed my rationalization with the passion of a hungry lion chasing after its next prey. I didn't need God intervening on this one when I already had it figured out. And so, days turned into weeks while God knocked and I pretended not to hear.
But God is patient. Like swallowing a spoonful of distasteful medicine, bending my will to His, promises strength and healing for my soul. He has a way of peeling the pride from my heart; preparing me to humbly accept the truth of that which He knows I need to hear.
And one day, my freshly humbled heart willed me to open the door.
"This is difficult for you," God said knowingly as He gently placed His hands on my shoulders. "It is, however, an essential part of something you cannot now comprehend, because you cannot see the end from the beginning. Walk with me dear, and we'll work on this together."
I took a deep breath and smiled as He took my hand in His, acknowledging how grateful I was that He could see the end from the beginning. My life seems so complicated. But He continues to work miracles. And once again I feel the depth of His unconditional love.
But God is patient. Like swallowing a spoonful of distasteful medicine, bending my will to His, promises strength and healing for my soul. He has a way of peeling the pride from my heart; preparing me to humbly accept the truth of that which He knows I need to hear.
And one day, my freshly humbled heart willed me to open the door.
"This is difficult for you," God said knowingly as He gently placed His hands on my shoulders. "It is, however, an essential part of something you cannot now comprehend, because you cannot see the end from the beginning. Walk with me dear, and we'll work on this together."
I took a deep breath and smiled as He took my hand in His, acknowledging how grateful I was that He could see the end from the beginning. My life seems so complicated. But He continues to work miracles. And once again I feel the depth of His unconditional love.
